I Never Knew This Could Happen
by DaemonFeathers
Summary: I never knew this could happen… Friends… No… Family was more correct. I never thought this was how my life would be… How I would be. I don't understand why… I don't care. For the first time in my life, I'm not alone… No longer running… No longer afraid.
1. The Beginning

_I never knew this could happen… Friends… No… Family was more correct. I never thought this was how my life would be… How I would be. I don't understand why… I don't care. For the first time in my life, I'm not alone… No longer running… No longer afraid._

I stood face to face with the very first person whom I could call _my friend_ that day. His name was Robin. He wasn't like other people; No, he definitely wasn't like other people. I remember his outfit well - skin tight clothing, red, yellow, and green (like a traffic light), spiked up hair, and a harlequin mask covering his eyes.

"Run!" he said to me with a worried look on his face. I didn't understand why he was talking to me; let alone why he said it with so much force. Then I saw it - a flash of green streaking across the sky like lightning, charging straight for us. He started running in my direction.

I was frozen. I was still trying to wrestle with myself on what to do. He ran straight into me and we both fell over. I still couldn't make out what had caused the green flash, but I knew one thing. I hurt… I balled up my fists in anger towards this new face and black energy formed around my hands. My eyes glowed white from the power and I hit him square in the chest with the blast. Robin was sent stumbling backwards by the blast and quickly recovered. "Whoa!" he said as he got up. "How did -" Before he finished his sentence the green flash charged at him again and knocked him back another thirty feet from me.

"Robin!" yelled out another quite large man… well… part-man. He was a larger male with African American skin tones, but only on half his body. The other half was machine. He was tall, about 6 ft. already and very defined. He ran towards the pain stricken boy and knelt down beside him. "Are you alright?" he asked. "I'm fine." Robin replied. "Are you okay?" He looked right at me. "Yes." This was my only reply to him. "Can you help us?" he asked me. "What's happening?"

Another form came between us at this point. A green cheetah sprinted towards Robin and began to change. I stood there in awe when I saw him. What was once an animal began to shift forms into a human being. Or at least _I_ thought he was human, he is green after all. "Dudes, this chick won't let up!" He shouted when reaching them. "I know BB, but we've got to get her under control before she wipes out the whole city." Cyborg looked back towards me, along with Robin, and Beast Boy.

 _I will never forget the first look he gave me. He's the reason I stepped in; the reason I am who I am today._

Beast Boy smiled at me. He looked me right in the eye and smiled. "Hey, umm… I'm Beast Boy. What's your name?" "Raven" I replied, trying to stay calm. "Sorry, I'm not used to being talked to." I quickly shied away and turned my face. "Raven, can you help us? I know that we just met, but we're outmatched here and this girl is beginning to destroy the city." Robin asked me with desperation in his voice. "Why is she acting like this?" I asked him. "We're not sure, but she came crashing down from the atmosphere and when we approached her she flipped and started flying around everywhere, crashing into things. We broke into formation and have been trying to chase her down since."

"Robin, we've got to hurry, she's not slowing down and this whole block is already a mess." Cyborg looked at me again. "Are you in?" Beast Boy asked. _I could feel something around him..._ I thought to myself. I tried turning away again. I was afraid of this feeling in my stomach that this boy was making me feel, but I stopped myself, regained composure, and looked at the three boys standing before me. "Sure."

We headed off towards the path of destruction and eventually came up to her. She was still glowing green, but she no longer looked blood-thirsty. Her hair was a brilliant red, and her skin was perfect. I could see it. She was in pain. As an empath, I can feel what others around me are feeling. I turned to Robin who could tell something was wrong. "Don't hurt her. She's in a lot of pain right now. Try talking to her." Robin looked at me in surprise. He walked up to the glowing alien girl. "Are you okay?" He asked, not really expecting an answer. She shook her head. He looked at her again and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Please, we're here to help you." She shook her head again and her glowing green eyes faded and revealed tears behind.

Robin turned back to the three of us and said: "Cyborg, Beast Boy, Let's get her back to the tower. Raven, you are free to go. Thanks for your help." "Wait!" I blurted out before thinking. Robin looked at me with a touch of confusion in his eyes. "Can I come with you? I don't exactly have a home or a place to stay right now." Robin chuckled slightly. "Of course you can. We have plenty of room at the Tower." He looked towards Cyborg and Beast Boy who both gave him an approving nod. He stood in front of me and held out his hand - in it, rested a yellow and black device with a large "T" on the face. "Here. This is a Titans communicator; it's how we all keep in touch with each other. Congratulations, Raven, you're now an honorary member of the Teen Titans!" "Woo hoo!" "Boo-yah!" shouted Beast Boy and Cyborg, respectively. Robin turned in the direction of the tower. "Come on Titans, Go!"

The five of them raced towards the tower. Raven watched in amazement as Robin, who was donning his R-cycle, zoomed down the Jump City streets with incredulous speeds. Cyborg was being carried by a green pterodactyl, while holding a still tear-struck girl in his arms. Upon reaching the tower, Cyborg lowered the girl to her feet and was released from the green pterodactyl's claws. The green being morphed back into a boy and couldn't help but notice Raven watching him as he did.

"Pretty cool, huh?" Beast Boy grinned at Raven. With naught an emotion, she replied "I've never seen someone shape-shift before, is all." He couldn't help but frown at the lack of emotion on her face, but smiled again when he turned towards the girl.

Robin looked at her. "Do you have a name?" He asked. The girl frowned at the question, but as he spoke, he pointed to himself and said his name clearly to help her understand. "I'm Robin." He turned to the others and again pointed to each one. "This is Cyborg, that's Beast Boy, and her name is Raven."

The girl finally understood as she spoke softly while pointing to herself. "Koriand'r". Robin couldn't help but frown in distaste at the name. Beast Boy spoke up. "Koriand'r? I'm not sure that's fitting enough for you. How about... Starfire!" He exclaimed. She smiled at the changeling and nodded in agreement, as did the others. All except Raven who stood silently by while watching. Her hood was raised, and her face hidden. She smiled.

 _This was our beginning._


	2. Fears

***Author's Note*** \- Hey guys, this is a story regarding the relationship between Raven and the rest of the team. Definitely BBxRae. I cannot say how long this story will be, or what will even happen at this time. Chapter 1 was my attempt at setting up Raven with the team. This story will mostly take place after the end of the cartoon show but will contain filler between the "Malchior incident" and the "Trigon incident". I hope you enjoy my thoughts on how the titans end up as well as I do.

 ***Disclaimer: Of course, you all know… I own nothing but my own imagination!**

* * *

 **Chapter 2: Fears**

 _I am afraid. I am weak. I am lost. I am lonely. I feel wrong… sick… hated... disgusted… unloved. It's not my place to be loved. I am what I am. I am a daughter to the unholy_ Thane of Perdition, _half-breed, outcast, demon…witch. I know what I am. A prophecy foretold my destiny long ago. I am to destroy the world, bring chaos and destruction. My life has been for nothing; only pain, suffering, sadness, loss, hatred, anger, fear. I am the Gem… I am afraid…_

 _No._

Raven awoke from yet another dream; no, another nightmare. She knew what was coming. She knew that she would do many terrible things in the coming months, and she couldn't help but feel… well… afraid.

There were so many things that she knew she wanted to do before it all happens.

Years had passed since she met the Titans. They have taken her in, given her somewhere to call home, and people to call _friends._ In those years, a lot has changed for her. For once in her life she felt like she belonged somewhere; that if she ever left they would actually _miss_ her. Never has she felt more strongly for anything before, and yet, this ragtag team had become her actual family. No matter what, she'd protect them. She'd lay her life down for them. Raven would go to the gates of Hell and beg for entrance before she'd let any of them feel pain. None of them knew. She didn't allow them to know. She wasn't prepared to say goodbye to them, and she knew that one day she would have to.

That day was approaching fast.

Raven got up from her bed and walked down the long hallway towards the kitchen. Once there she proceeded to grab the necessary ingredients to prepare her morning tea. An herbal delight, which the scent of could easily calm her and make her feel better.

The nightmare the night before was no different than the one she'd been reliving almost every night of her life. Some would think that seeing the same images every night would force you to get used to them. She never did. It's hard to watch as the world around you falls apart due wholly because _you exist;_ to watch in vivid detail as the people around you turn to solid stone, frozen in pain, and horror never escaping their now unrelenting, dim, _dying_ eyes. People you _care about_ , people you _trust_ , people you _love_ … gone. The only reminder of their existence is their pain-stricken faces carved with every minute detail in the stone surrounding them. The statues fall. They crumble into the Earth as if time itself just whisked them away and forced you to forget them; to forget their pain, their fears; and the winds scatter the dust and ash far away from you, leaving nothing but a memory, a faint, distant, memory. This was her nightmare. Over and over again it played in her mind, toying with her emotions, forcing her to become cold and bitter, so that she would not have those attachments, so she would not feel so much pain, so she would not be so afraid.

Raven became lost in thought about the nightmare she so abhors; detested by its very nature, it acts as a constant reminder of what she will do. She looked down at her cup of tea, noticed it had gotten cold while she thought to herself, and muttered under her breath. "I am afraid."

"Raven?" Beast Boy was on the couch. He had fallen asleep during one of the many late night video game binges he went on. It was 3:30 in the morning and she had just awakened him with her muttering.

She watched in pure amusement (though she'd never admit it) as the changeling groggily rose from his spot on the couch and shuffled across the living room floor towards her. "Why are you up?" He asked. She gave him a piercing glare that made him shy away from her slightly; his body visibly trembled at the sight. Looking at him, Raven couldn't help but feel ashamed that just the sight of her morning glare honestly frightened him, but she neglected this and responded sharply (a little more so than she meant) "Does it matter?"

Beast Boy looked down at his feet before returning his gaze slowly to meet her eyes. The changeling knew better than to joke around at this hour, when he was exhausted, sleep deprived, and honestly terrified that if he said the wrong thing she would just toss him out the window… again. He did it anyway. "I know! You came to see me!" a big toothy grin spread across his face as he made a move towards her. He wrapped her in his arms quickly and held her tight. He knew what this would make her do. He knew that she would be mad. He didn't care.

At first she was honestly shocked by the move. She didn't flinch, she didn't yell, and as a matter of fact, she knew that in the back of her mind, she _allowed_ it to happen, and THAT scared her more than anything at the moment. She could feel his slow breathing and his heartbeat pounding in his chest from exhilaration of knowing that she could hurt him; send him flying through the window, or worse. She made no move to get away. She held this position for as long as she could in her mind. Only a mere second had passed in reality.

She pushed out of his arms forcefully and stared him down with four glowing red eyes. Rage was in control.

* * *

 _Nevermore._

"Why do we always push away?" Happy asked the others. The pink cloaked emotion staring down the image of Beast Boy in the background was bearing a look of disdain, reaching for him. "I think it's cute!"

"You know he only does it to irritate her." A yellow cloaked emotion with glasses emerged next to the pink one. Knowledge pursed her lips. "He's done it about 2467 times with the same feeling about him. He knows it bothers Raven, and yet, he continues anyway."

"He really is a trooper!" A green cloaked emotion slapped the back of her yellow cloaked companion, earning a loud yelp of pain from Knowledge, who turned to look back at Brave and scold her for being so forthcoming about the situation.

"They say the definition of Insanity is repeating the same exact action and expecting a different outcome." said Wisdom, a blue cloaked emotion, while she slowly came to stand between Brave and Knowledge with a slight smirk on her face.

"He's not insane."

The four emotions each turned on their heels at the sound of the voice; small, yet still strong in its own way. They looked at the grey cloaked emotion with raised eyebrows and disbelief strewn across their faces. Timid shifted uncomfortably at their gazes, and turned her back towards them. "At least, I don't think so."

Rude was next to show herself in their company. She sat beside Timid and glanced up at the image of Beast Boy. "I don't care." She said. Apparently these three little words were enough to exhaust her as the orange cloaked emotion leaned back on her arms, then flat on her back facing upwards towards the dark abyss above them. She started pointing absentmindedly at the small white dots that stretched the length of the sky.

"Why does he always feel the need to TOUCH US!" the voice was big, not booming, but enough to silence the others; for a moment at least. Rage neared the image of Beast Boy and threw a hard fist in the direction of his face. Then turned around, clearly annoyed by the whole thing, and walked away in frustration. The red emotion stopped for a split second after noticing another one of Raven's emotions, no longer bound, and running loose through the forest of Nevermore. She recognized her instantly. Her voice began small, hesitant, even. "No, you shouldn't be here." The shift in tone between lines was deafening. "You're not _allowed!_ " Her voice had reached its peak. A shrill undertone lining the otherwise normal voice they all shared. She looked back at the image and screamed at it. "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'VE DONE!"

All the others became dead silent. Happy's grin was gone. Knowledge and Wisdom both looked at Rage with fear in their eyes; even Brave backed out of this one. They knew that she existed as a part of Raven's demonic heritage, and they both knew that she was supposed to be Raven's anger, but this… this was pure, unadulterated Rage. None of the other emotions knew what was going on. None of them knew what to do in this situation. They were all afraid… afraid of this absolute and infinite hatred that they were witnessing.

Rage grew tenfold and the others watched in horror as she took control of Raven.

* * *

Beast Boy didn't know what to do. He knew she would get mad, but _this,_ this was way beyond anything he thought her capable of towards any of the Titans… towards _him_. He'd seen her upset before and even angry, but he had seen her eyes glow like this only once. That was one very specific encounter with a certain Dr. Light. She had been having a really bad day already and he did not make it better. He taunted her relentlessly and finally she caved. Needless to say, they never heard much out of him anymore.

He backed away slowly from the now towering Raven, who bore the four glowing red eyes, and a twisted smile upon her lips; what he could tell was only a sense of utter enjoyment of his fear.

"Raven? I - I - I was just kidding… I'm sorry, okay!" He pleaded with her, gesturing with his hands that he surrendered. She didn't falter. Her rage intensified and she glided steadily towards him until he had been backed up to the wall. She leaned down until her face just slightly brushed his cheek. She stayed like this for what seemed like forever.

"Don't ever touch me like that again." She said, quietly, whispering directly into his ear. He shuddered at the sound of her voice and recoiled back into the wall behind him. The harshness of her words tore at every fiber of his being, and he felt like he was in pain. She slowly began to sink back into her normal form; her violet hair swept to the side, and her brilliant amethyst eyes returning. She had a bead of sweat forming on her head from over-exertion and her body began to tremble.

Beast Boy looked in shock towards the now limp Raven before him. This same girl who conjured up all of his deepest darkest fears in a single moment was now curled up on the floor with tears begging to break through her eyes as she fought her hardest to keep them held back. She looked completely and utterly defeated. Her actions tonight could not be taken back; what she'd said, and the fear she knew had been planted in his mind towards her. She knew that. She looked towards the cowering boy before her. "I'm sorry, Beast Boy."

"Rae? Are you okay?" Beast Boy looked at her intensely, afraid to touch her, as if her skin had somehow become as fragile as paper, but sharp as a blade at the same time. He wanted desperately to come to her aide… to her side and hold her. He knew this was stupid considering what happened last time he held her in his arms, and refused to go through that again. This time, it wasn't he who was hurt. He wasn't in pain; at least, not physical. He stared at the small girl before him and for the first time since he first met her, he could _feel_ her pain, sense her emotions, and even look into those beautiful amethyst eyes he so loved, craved even, and see fear.


End file.
